The thoughts that were thunk and the goings on of my life.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Rants

On my way to work this morning I got in the lane to make the turn in and thought about trying to juke around the guy so that I could actually not just creep the entire way into our facilities. I saw that it was an Accord in front of me, but then was hopeful by seeing the little silver and black V6 right next to the nameplate. Sliding back in my lane I had a moment of calm before my logical left brain realized that the extra power means nothing for Accords, but by then it was too late and I had to piddle behind the person slowly going from tailgating to way behind and back again.

What's the point of having a Honda Accord with a V6? I swear every time I get behind one of those stupid things it's going just as slow as if it said V2. Honda Accords are right up there with minivans and old people with walkers for how slow they go. Each corner they enter might as well have a gigantic speed bump and a baby carriage in it for stinking slow they go!

The saddest part is they could be great vehicles! Just look at the specs for an Accord versus my car. C'mon, you have 80 hp more than I do! But have you ever utilized it? No! I doubt that even 10% or those vehicles have ever seen anything on the red side of 4000 RPMs. (And those 10% probably did it on accident when their foot slipped off of the brake while they were in park.) Why? Because the drivers of these vehicles are lame. There is no reason they should have that power other than they think it makes them cooler, which it does not...just proves how lame they really are.

Cars like this should have systems where they shock the drivers when speeds below 10 mph are maintained for more than 30 seconds. While we're at it there should be tickets issued to all Accord and minivan drivers that attempt to enter the left-hand lane.

In the meantime I think I'm going to install some missile launchers on the front of my car so I don't have to deal with drivers that make a three-toed sloth look like it's in a hurry.

6 comments:

Mom said...

Hey now, you actually own an Accord even if I drive it.

yi said...

you clearly do not embrace the culture surrounding rice rockets. actually, it's probably best you don't.

Michael said...

How exactly does that theoretical "V2" work?

Evans said...

Hmm... A V2 is like a bicycle I guess. Two legs = two pistons.

You should distract yourself from all the road rage by talking on your cell phone. If everyone talked on their cell phone, everything would be just fine! Hehehe...

Otis said...

Mom:
It's true I own an Accord, but you should remember how much I enjoyed test driving all of those Accords and Camrys!

Yi:
I would embrace ricer culture if I had more money to waste on mods like this...as is I won't even fix the crack in my windshield.

Mike and Evans:
Actually V2 engines are pretty prevalent, particularly in motorcycles (SV650, Harleys, Ducati 999, etc).

They work like this:

Jacob W. Foshee said...

Amen to that brother.
That's why I regularly shift up in the power band of my SL2. And I still get 32-33 mpg.